fisheye cam trolleys into the club and zooms on a thug lookin white dude. it's not me tho. the place is pretty bumpin and they are playin some oldskool hip hop but not that "emcee" rhymes stuff naam sayin. camera still lookin at dude and he throws a drink into the cam. ACADEMIC. ESSAYS. BRO. the words slam onto the screen like food mishaps onto your kitchen counter. camera turns like 540 deg clockwise and the guy behind the table looks at the camera cheesin like a young bill gates, dressed to the sevens. not even in logoed sportswear. with like no paisley at all not even any polygons and no aliasing:
bro. academic essays bro is a friggin hit bro! thanks for being such a bro!! but i am just an obscure gangsta singer songwriter producer and pacifist human who doesn't wear white t-shirts and actually im not sure i have biceps. o wait. there they are! anyways, do you think you could ask the bros to friggin give me a break? thanks bro.
academic essays bro title shout ho!
roll the track: the cardigans - i need some fine wine and you, you need to be nicer
then it's a slow mo music video. girls dance around the table and behind the seated guy. t-shirted people in front raise their hands and beverages perhaps in praise of some kind of beer bellied deity, although the effect is more like "yolo!". some regular bros have some drama, a drink breaks really slowly in midair never reversing, and strobe lights go off, and then ahha you're back lookin at the table and man do these girls do some illogical stuff. the song ends and everybody remains cool and when the next track plays it is jungle brother by jungle brothers and everybody dances safely not performing any power moves or dangerous flips or flailing their limbs, merely remaining within the spaces permitted to them and looking mostly forwards with their arms crossed. syke! the crowd goes wild and we see some of the newest stuff to go down in breakdancing and man did i mention it is w-w-w-wild.
academic. essays. bro! season one. episode five. what!
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